Being a Resource - An Appraisal Chapter

All charcters in the below story are imaginary. Any resemblance to people dead or alive is purely coincidental.

PM: Good Morning dude.
SE: Morning boss.
PM: so how are you?
SE: Doing Fine sir. How about you sir?
PM: Very fine man. So let's start.
SE: ok sir.
PM: I went through your comments for the 'tasks' assigned to you for last cycle. You were on bench for the last two months right?
SE: yes sir.
PM: i find that being on bench (refers to time spent without a project assigned.Need not be sitting idle.) you haven't contributed anything for the company.
You have just attended some technical sessions and submited few knowledge sharing documents.
SE: but sir, being on bench how can i do some work if i've not been assigned anything. and i wasn't sitting idle sir. I was involved in giving KT (knowledge
transfer) sessions to newcomers.
PM: Man. You have to be 'Proactive'. Ask for work. Get ur 'utilization' level increased. No use of just sumbitting few docs or taking KT sessions even though
it maybe useful.
SE: But sir, i was told that there was no project as per my previous experience or training.
PM: No man, there are projects for you in 'pipeline' (trying to show that the horizon has a silver lining!!) but the point to be noted is that you have to set an example for others being more 'motivated' in your work. Show more 'analysis' capability.
PM: Ok leave it. i see that you have worked on a support and testing project the 4 months prior to that. You haven't done any development? There was a 'scope' for 'automation' in the work you performed.
SE: The project demanded only support and testing work sir and apart from that automation and development work was done by the IT team of client side.
PM: Man. That's not an excuse.You have to 'delight' the client by taking up automation work proactively. You could have 'brought business' from the client side like the onsite folks do.
SE: But sir you have never given me a chance to go onsite or have an interaction with the client team.
PM: You are giving lame excuses man. And I see that you haven't appreciated the work of your teammates. You haven't 'nominated' anyone for 'spot awards' or shown any 'leadership' skills.
SE: sir i'm just a SE(Software engg), i don't have the privilege to nominate anyone for awards. Others in my team are either my level or higher.
PM: You haven't shown interest in taking additional responsiblities of the team like being the CC or QA or KM. (hard to explain!!)
SE: but sir we already have team members assigned for these tasks.
PM: but you should have asked proactively to take charge of these roles.hmmm...No use of telling you.and by the way, you have to get used to working in mainframe development for your next assignment.
SE: that would be little difficult sir considering my previous experiences in support n testing.
PM: (losing temper) you are not at all 'flexible' man. you still want to be working on some crap support n testing projects which does no good. I can give you only a rating of 2 on 5 considering your 'peer group' is having team leaders and senior members.
SE: (standing up) you say i'm not flexible!! i was trained for 3 months in java and when i joined production you asked me to do Dot Net coding for 6 months initially with no one to guide or support.You said it was due to some urgent requirements.
after i learn everything and complete the major assignment on Dot net you asked me to to switch to Open systems, where i had to learn all the unix commands and oracle from scratch. Once i was getting settled with the support you assign the testing work also to me saying we can't pull in more members due to 'billable issues' and ask me to be familiar with writing test cases and working on testing tools. Now you want me to learn age old mainframes to do some crap work for some stupid company who can't spend some money to update or migrate their software to the latest platforms. And on top of that you say i have been doing crap support and testing work. do you remember the time you addresed everyone in the project mentioning that we were doing excellent work working day and night and even come to office on sundays to give weekend support. And now you say i was doing crap work and i'm not flexible.
PM:(surprised) what happened man. You are losing your temper. You shud be ready to take up 'challenges'.Be ready to 'work under pressure' to give 'quality' product. I know you are an exceptional 'resource' and a very good 'team player'.(changing track!!) You are an asset to the company.
SE: Yes i'm a resource. just a resource. Just like any of the computer or printer in the office. You provide free coffee vending machines to work day and night and at the end of the month give us peanuts in return for the hardwork we put in. I'm done sir. This resource is happy to announce to you proactively that he is not anymore a resource of this company. I submit my resignation. And by the way i have given a feedback about you to the HR yesterday. He said he'll mail you. Check your mail box may be you'll have your appraisal scheduled soon. GOODBYE:)

p.s. the words in ' ' are those used by Project managers to trick the juniors to show that they know everything, just to create some impressions. If you hear any of these words from your manager be sure that he is lying :)

Ritu - Seasons change. Do we?

After 1 yr of release i happened to buy the original vcd of Ritu since i had missed this movie in the theatres which was released during my stint at a really boring project in Infy Mysore. Normally before watching a movie i check out the basic review of the movie and ask my friends those who have watched the movie and keep in mind some keywords which i would have read/heard about it. For Rithu the keywords were friendship, love, IT life, betrayal. So i started to think about the storyline and assumed it to be a triangular love story which was shot in background of the IT industry. I was totally wrong!! And that's the reason why i liked the movie (I love surprises!!!). It was fresh, surprising, nostalgic package with beautiful frames, lovely dialogues, fresh music and beautiful people.

The story revolves around 3 childhood friends with deep friendship who had to split after their college days to work for the IT industry as software slaves to earn pocket filling salary leaving their dreams behind. (even i'm doing the same!!)

Nishan as Sarat Varma the son of a communist writer moves to the US due to the pressure from his brother-in-law who is running IT firm in the US.
Asif as Sunny Itty the son of a businessman joins an IT major in Bangalore to escape from the clutches of his brutal dad.
Rima as Varsha John, the girl among the trio also joins the company where Asif works leaving behind her mom alone.

The story begins with the return of Sarat from US to join a small IT firm in the technopark in Kerala. He asks his childhood buddies to join him in the new venture. Sarat is a nostalgic person who values his friendship with Varsha and Sunny more than anything else in the world. He didn't change much after his US stint and he also expected his friends would be like that. But he was wrong. The Bangalore pub culture had poisoned them and relationships didnt have much meaning to them. Their lifestyle and mindset had changed over the years.

Sarat decides to follow his dreams of becoming a writer after his elder brother tells him to move on with life after his relationship with his friends go haywire. Will the friendship return or will they be separated forever is the climax of the movie.

Director Shyamaprasad has proved that he can also take youthful movies with a message with beautiful frames.
The scriptwriter Joshua Newtonn is a revelation. Hoping to see fresh themes with poetic dialogues from him in future too.
The cameraman Shyam Dutt needs a special mention here. Very rarely we get to see youth oriented movies taken in such realistic ways.It really makes one nostalgic. The music by Rahul Raj was also good and the lyrics in the songs made it look something with substance. The Song 'Venal Kaattil' brought a lot of childhood memories. The actors (not only the main characters) have performed well, almost all of them being debutants.
The role played by Sarat's elder bro was excellent. The actor M.G Sasi literally lived the role. In short it is a movie worth watching alone on a sunday evening with a hot lemon 'chai' and somthing to nibble on. A must watch for youngsters who are in the rat race.

The life is like seasons. It keeps changing. But we need to make sure that we don't change for the seasons, but be ourselves and adapt to the seasons when necessary.

Thoughts for the month

When i was a small child my mom always used to say, study hard today so that you will be able to enjoy your life later on. Being a child who believed his
mother's words, i studied well and sailed through easily to reach high school. When i was facing my 1st board's she again said "study hard son, so that you will get respect and will be able enjoy your life later on". Being the 1st board's i was facing i decided to heed to her words and put in full effort. I did quite well for the 1st boards. After reaching the pre college days, she again said study hard for the entrance son, you will be enjoying your life later on.
This time she couldn't fool me.(i fared very badly for entrance..thats another story.. will tell you later ;)) I asked her right away "Amma you have been
telling me the same thing from the day i started attending my kindergarten, till now i haven't found the 'enjoyment in life' you were talking about". She seemed puzzled. But i asked her "Okay consider i study well for the entrance today and get into a good engineering college as you and dad want me to. How will i be able to enjoy coz of that? I will again have to perform hard since i will be studying with the best engineering minds of the land. Consider i do that. What next? " "You wil get a good job with a high salary package", she said. "So, high salary means what good does it do to me?", i asked. "Well you can buy a car, build a house in few years,have a good bank balance, get respect in society ". "So how are these things going to help me.Will it make me happy?" She was getting angry now. "hmmm.. you can marry a beautiful girl from a good family and settle down".I still went on to see what my mother's reaction would be. "So after settling down i will be happy and will be enjoying life is it?" So i do everything to get married to a pretty girl from a good family?? Mom, trust me, i could that even without wasting so much of energy studying hard and working hard for so many years. As per what you said i actually start
'enjoying' my life after i'm 30 or something.
My dad who was hearing this conversation while reading his sunday newspaper interrupted me and said, "No son its not that way, the journey which takes you
there is basically what life is all about. You learn to live from the experiences of your life, from your mistakes, from the people you meet. Your right may be wrong for another person and vice-versa. Your concept of happiness may be different from another person. Its up to you to find out the purpose of your birth. By the time you have a degree in your hand you will realize what to do in life. You would have had the experiences to learn from. Till then listen to us"

We always tend to look for materialistic happiness. I have friend who is crazy about mobile phones. He keeps on changing his phone every 6 months. If you ask him why he does that. He tells "with the latest phone you are upto date with the technology and it makes me feel proud and happy".While working his ass off in office the thought of buying the latest phone or ipod is what drives him from working so hard. Another friend of mine lives on the principle 'The grass is always greener on the other side'. He might have everything, but still he is never satisfied with what he has. If any of his friends buys something new he works hard to get something better than that. So he never finds happiness with what he has.

Have anybody thought what if we find happiness with what we already blessed with. We always try to look for something better overlooking what we already have. Shed your ego, jealousy, hatred and prejudist mind. Smile often, be receptive, help others, be humane, stand for what is right, be brave, be empathatic. The world will be a better place to live if everyone thinks that way.

Life is a lesson to be learnt through experiences. Experiences give better understanding of life. Better understanding of life gives less reasons to worry
about. Less reasons to worry about means more happiness. And the happiness is not something which we have to earn just by working for a period of time. We should learn to be happy while working hard itself.If one is happy with what he is having and enjoying the work he is doing he will never feel sad. Working hard on something what you love will never feel like a hard work for you. So be happy and keep smiling and makes others smile too. :)

Dayscholar Diaries

I was one of the very few guys in the college who had a chance to experience the life of a hosteller as well as that of a day scholar. It was during the 3rd year, after spending the semester vacation at college for summer course for Sem 3 Maths (the record has still not been broken. 100 arreared for Sem 3 maths!!)and making a trip to Ooty with the school friends, i was not in a mood to attend the 3rd yr classes which began sometime in July.

Moving in with my new room mate Pai (Don Pai) and 2 others (i forgot who they were!). I was preparing myself to study hard atleast in 3rd yr and be well prepared for the placement (God was laughing!!).

1 week of class and i fell ill. The college doctor diagonised it to be fever and kept giving me crocin tablets until one day when my eyes went yellow. Yes it was Jaundice.

The hostel wardens were not in a mood to leave me in the middle of a week even after getting a letter from the doctor.
They wanted a written letter from home and permission from Class Advisor,HOD,Dean, Student affairs, Chief warden....The list went on. When i was sure that i would drop dead if i delay anymore, i approached the new warden who had joined the day before and told him about my condition and gave a signed letter saying i'm ready to face any consequences if i was found to be faking.

Yeah right! I was like a prisoner who was convicted for a culpable homicide. Just the fact that i was killing myself allowing me to stay back in hell. Thankfully, he felt sorry for me and gave me the permission to go home and signed off the gate pass.
(It would have been easier to get a visa to US!!) I somehow managaed to get a bus booked through travel agency and reached home by night. As my mom opened the door i threw my luggage and fell onto the couch. The next thing i remember was waking up in the casuality section of a hospital with the doctor telling my dad that "Your son would have been deadif you had delayed for one more day". Some particular 'value' in blood which was supposed to be 50 had shot upto a whooping 5000!!!
They were more than happy to test all sorts of medicine and treatment as they had got a rare specimen who made the value till 5000 and still survived.

The days going forward was not so bad as i had thought it to be. I was pampered by beautiful nurses and my parents was showing extra sympathy for surviving in Amrita. I felt like a war hero who had survived the attack of the terrorists and had saved the life of the millions of civilians. Any request i made to my parents during those days were fulfilled.

It was at that time i thought,'This is the best time to come out of hostel and have some fun as a dayschi'. I put forth this request and it was approved by them. The next big task was to get the permission from the college for the same.

I forgot to mention another stuff. During the 2 weeks at hospital and 2 weeks at home i had been receiving threatening calls from the class advisor to come back as soon as possible or else i will have to sit with my juniors for rest of my college life. More than the pain of the disease and injections, this mental torture seemed too much to handle.

My jaundice came to a controlled level after taking a herbal medicine from a 'ayurvedic healer' from a place called Addaat near Thrissur. But i was asked to take complete rest for 3 more weeks.

Then one fine day i received a call from the department saying if i didnt report in 2days, they won't have any other option since i will not be able to make up the attendance lack even if i attend all days including the national holidays where they took attendance!! I told dad that i'm ready to move, even though i was not cured completely.

Dad's contacts in Coimbatore(CBE) got me a single bedroom to stay in a bachelor's lodge in Sai baba colony in CBE. So me and my dad started to CBE after all the packing and called up the department to tell that we were coming.
They responded saying that if we were not able to reach college before 2 pm, I would not be able to meet anyone in the department and i would have to wait for next monday which means i will be out of college. Wasting no time we started for college.

But unfortunately on the way our car met with an accident.

Though no one was hurt i thought we could never reach college on time and on top of that it started to rain making it more difficult to drive. But somewhere it was written i should be studying with the one of the best gang in college.


Reached college by 1 pm. Met Mishra sir who is the most kind hearted person in our college. He spoke to my dad and told there is nothing to worry and i will just have to attend all classes going forward (No more bunking :(). And he gave me the permission to move out of the hostel and become a day scholar. Though the class advisor Malathi maam gave the usual scare, mentioning i may not be able to clear all papers this year, even she told my dad that they would give me all the support needed.

Next hurdle was to get the permission from the so called 'Student welfare affairs' head Dr.Kannan. I hated my name only for the reason that even that ****** had the same name. The way he behaved to my dad, i felt like giving him a tight slap right at that moment. But somehow kept myself cool. He made my dad write on a paper that 'If i was found to be staying alone i could be dismissed from the college without any notice'. My dad again looked at me as if i was a hero who had again saved the country from not only a bunch of terrorists but also from local goons in orange & white clothes (i hope u get it!!).

He appreciated my bravery with that looks. I felt proud, AGAIN!!!

Packing up all my stuff from hostel i reached cbe to find my new room. My dad's friend took us there and helped me get settled.

In the evening while i was going out to see off my dad, one familiar face came walking upto me. It was Sriraj and he was staying in the same building as mine. Dad was happy that i had company.

So that's how i began my eventful dayscholar life for one year after which i returned back to hostel for the final year.
(Dont ask me why!!)

Thanks to Sriraj, JP,Vibushan, Rahul krishnan, CGV, Mukundan, Vivek, Anand, Deepak, Vijaykrishnan, Ramekumar and any others if i have missed out i had some of the best times spent in CBE. Be it the roadside foodings, musical nights with Sriraj and Rahul, mokkai nights, sam anderson & TR jokes nights, college jokes (ES & EM. LOL!!) nights, exam nights (mostly with all the stuff mentioned before :) ), long strolls
on Race course, weekend movies, evenings at Village restaurant and many more such memorable days.

The stay at Veyes towers with Sriraj, the one person with similar tastes as mine, fun nights at Vibu's and Sriraj's apartments.(Thanx a ton to ur parents for that!!)

And Jp's home was always my second home. I was considered as the 4th son by Jp's loving parents.

The 'fun-filled'group study days. Sriraj,Anand and Vibu you guys have a great way of explaining stuff in a simple way (Remember CG exam!!).

I even learnt how to cope up when you feel really lonely at times (which really helps me now).

All in all it was a fun filled learning experience for life.

And by the way i cleared that sem with no arrears or supplimentaries (Many friends checked my result before checking their's to see how badly i have fared, and to their surprise i had cleared all papers!!) Thanks to you guys else it would have been never
possible.

Even though hostel and day scholar life was two different worlds, i was fortunate enough to enjoy and learn a lot at the same time from both of them. These are the sweet memories of Mayavi who was a dayschi for a year.

Thanks to everyone who made it possible. :)